Quick Hits – March 2016

When I came up with the idea for this blog feature, I envisioned reviewing everything that I watched or read during the month.  I have come to realize this is unrealistic.  Although some months may be a bit light on the entertainment options, usually I watch/read more things than I have time to review.  Therefore, I am limiting myself to no more than six reviews in a month.  If my options allow for it, I will do two TV shows, two movies, and two books.  If they do not, then I will substitute or skip as needed.  Everything else consumed during the month will just be listed with a quick yes or no recommendation at the bottom.

Warning:  Although I tried not to delve into plots too deeply, there are potential spoilers in the reviews below.  Read at your own risk.

TV Series:  One Tree Hill:  Seasons 1-4 (2003-2006)

I had such a restricted TV routine when I was growing up that as an adult I feel the need to watch all these shows that were on when I was a teenager.  One Tree Hill is my current nostalgic foray into the past.  I have watched the first four seasons over the past few months.  I really enjoy the show, but I cannot say that it is one of my favorites.  When it sticks to the more conventional high school drama format, I think it really shines.  I like the majority of teenage characters, the majority of the time.  I have fun living with them through the requisite love triangles and awkward social moments.  What brings the show down for me is the overkill drama they include all the time.  A show like this obviously needs some conflict to keep things interesting, but I think they pack too many things into it and take storylines too far.  For a few examples, these characters have been in the hospital every single season at least once, and the fake-Derek stalker story was just too much unnecessary craziness given everything else packed into season 4.  I plan to keep going, at least for now, but it is sometimes hard to watch it.  I much prefer something light-hearted like Dawson’s Creek or Gilmore Girls.

TV Series:  Flesh and Bone (2015)

I loved this series.  I was drawn to it by the ballet backdrop and the inclusion of Sascha Radetsky (Charlie in the 2000 movie Center Stage).  I watched the whole thing in a 24-hour period because of the gripping story.  I did not know much about the TV show when I got the first DVD in the mail.  I honestly assumed it would be something similar to Center Stage, a feel good show about beating the odds in the competitive ballet world.  While Claire did in fact struggle to prove she earned her special place in the American Ballet Company, the ballet portion of the show was much more of a backdrop.  The show actually focused on Claire’s personal background, involving incest and sexual abuse, which greatly shaped her perspective on life and her ability to navigate social interactions.  The show was extremely dark, gritty, and intense.  I could not tear myself away.  I even ordered a free trial of Starz to be able to watch the second half immediately without having to return the first DVD to Netflix.  I highly recommend this show if you like weirdly interesting stories.  Plus, you do get some great dancing along the way.  Also for those from Pittsburgh, there are some nice hometown references since Claire originally lived there before moving to New York City.  I really wish they were going to do a second season.

Movie:  Boyhood (2014)

I enjoyed this movie, but I do not think it is for everyone.  It is an indie film that follows the life of one boy over a span of twelve years.  The director actually filmed over the same span of time, so he could use the same actors as they aged naturally into the plotlines of the film.  As a piece of art, this movie is phenomenal.  The creative inspiration to allow the actors to grow throughout the film was genius.  It gives the movie a very authentic feel which is missing from most movies that attempt to age characters, especially children.  I also appreciate the dedication required from the director as well as the actors that participated in the project.  As a piece of entertainment, this movie is limited in the audiences that will find it appealing.  It has a very low budget independent feel to it.  The story is slice-of-life blandness, being much more about an average boy’s growth than any kind of conflict resolution.  It is also a bit on the lengthy side, going for more than two and a half hours.  If you are drawn to character sketches then this is worth watching.  The movie is beautifully done, well cast, and attention holding.  However, if you are looking for big storylines, over-the-top cinematography, and fast action, this is not for you.

Movie:  St Vincent (2014)

This was a recommendation from my boss, and I am not sure it would have crossed my radar otherwise.  Taken at a glance, this is a movie you have seen before.  The storyline is something fairly common place, grumpy old man is softened by vulnerable boy in need.  The ending is utterly predictable.  In fact, it is blatantly revealed by the title of the film before you even start watching.  What makes it worth watching is the execution of the story.  It boasts an all-star cast with Bill Murray as the grumpy old man, Jaeden Lieberher as the vulnerable boy, Melissa McCarthy as his mother, Chris O’Dowd as a school teacher who provides narrative background, and Naomi Watts as a prostitute because why not.  Despite some big names in comedy, the actors turn in very understated performances for their characters.  They hit the perfect balance between comedy and drama that left me laughing and crying throughout the film.  Even though the ending is obvious, you are cheering for it just the same when you finally get there.  It serves as a good reminder to go beneath the surface and evaluate people as a whole and not to write them off because of rough first impressions.  Please do not discount this movie because you think you have seen it before.  It is worth watching, and I recommend it to everyone.

Book:  The Brightest Star in the Sky by Marian Keyes (2009)

I needed something light for the weekend, so I went back to another Marian Keyes book.  Although this one was much better than This Charming Man, this was still not one of my preferred reads from her.  This book is about a spirit as it follows the inhabitants of an apartment building.  The spirit has a mission to fulfill with one of the tenants, but it does not know which one yet (and we do not even find out what the mission is until later in the book).  Over the course of two months, it follows the occupants of each of the four floors of the building narrating to the reader the life events of each one and evaluating which one is best suited for its purpose.  The occupants lead fairly mundane lives, relatively separated from each other, until a crisis brings them together one night toward the end.  These characters were a bit more likable and knowable than the last book, though I do think Ms. Keyes does better when she focuses on one character instead of bouncing between multiple.  The weird thing about this book though was the spirit’s purpose once it was revealed.  The story was based on an Irish fairytale, and I just did not take to it.  Maybe I am just not Irish enough to appreciate it.  Still not a bad book, but I will stick with my recommendations of Sushi for Beginners or Watermelon if you want to give Marian Keyes a try.

Book:  The Wilderness by McKay Coppins (2015)

I read this book based on its fairly lengthy subtitle, Deep Inside the Republican Party’s Combative, Contentious, Chaotic Quest to Take Back the White House.  Although I would consider myself independent, I lean more conservative in my voting practices.  The past year has been a whirlwind of candidates popping up and dropping out of the republican primaries.  I cannot keep them all straight, and have no idea who I would want as the eventual Republican nominee.  When I learned about this book, I thought it would be perfect to give me more familiarity with the candidates.  I do feel I learned about the personal history of some of the viable candidates while I read it.  However, the book is already a bit dated from where the process is today.  It barely mentions John Kasich who is still in the race, and it details much about Bobby Jindal who dropped out at the end of last year.  It did provide some interesting glimpses into the two men at the top of the Republican field currently:  Donald Trump and Ted Cruz.  I would recommend it if you are interested in learning more about some of the Republican candidates.  I would not recommend it if you are looking for a breakdown of Republican politics.  The book does focus more on personalities than policies, though you get a general feel for some of each person’s pet issues.  I would also warn that the author does put his own color into his coverage of the people.  While I could not tell you if Coppins is republican or democrat, I can tell you there were people he admired more than others.  I did use this to fill in some information on the candidates along with what I have gathered from other media outlets when I chose how to vote in the March 1 Republican primary.

Overflow:

Movie:  The Overnight (2015) – Yes, but only if you are not easily offended by nudity and weird sexual situations.

Movie:  Madam Bovary (2015) – Yes

Movie:  Life of Pi (2012) – Yes

Movie:  Dysfunctional Friends (2011) – No

Book:  The Shining by Stephen King (1977) – Yes.  I still get scared by the bathtub scene even though I have read the book before and watched the TV mini-series.

Book:  Doctor Sleep by Stephen King (2013) – Yes.  This sequel to The Shining is less scary than the original and more weird, but weird is where Stephen King excels.

Book:  A Long Fatal Love Chase by Louisa May Alcott (wrote 1866, published 1995) - Yes

That is it for this month.  I watched a lot of movies this time around, though truthfully some of those are from the end of February when I had the week off.  Do you have any good recommendations for what I should watch or read in April?

See you next week!

Time Management Part 2 - Evenings

I mentioned a few weeks ago that I intended to do a second part of the time management blog, focusing on evenings.  I had some motivation and timing issues which kept me from doing it right away.  Now I finally have a weekend where I feel good, have some extra time to work on it, and do not have any blogs that need to be written first, like the keeping up with the first Wednesday of the month Front Room blog or the once in a life time I’m An Auntie blog.

This blog has to be different from Part 1 – Mornings.  In that blog, I was able to show a concrete effort that had produced some results to get a better grasp on my morning routine.  With the evenings, I find myself much more unfocused and varied in the tasks that need to be done.  I have made some changes to my routine lately, trying to make the evening better and also trying to compensate for things I moved from the morning.  Overall, I often feel like I do not accomplish much in my evenings, but I have little idea of how to make them any better.  Most recently, I have been trying to compartmentalize my evenings and schedule them out by day of the week.  Years ago, this is how I used to organize my life and it provided some measure of routine and calm for me.  Now, it is much harder to be rigid because of family and work distractions but I am hoping at least some routine will provide some relief.

Monday:  I need to leave work at 5:00 because I have an appointment with a therapist at 6:00.  My appointment runs from 6:00 to 7:00.  When I get home, I make and eat dinner.  Then, I take my evening shower.  Around 8:30, I sign on to AIM where I talk to one, or sometimes two, of my non-local friends while browsing the internet.  I try to end the conversations by 10:00.

Tuesday:  I attempt to leave work by 5:30.  I go to the gym, spending approximately an hour.  When I get home, I spend the evening with my husband.  He cooks dinner.  We usually watch an episode of Supernatural while eating.  I encourage us to both go upstairs by 8:30.  We have sex, hopefully quickly (I think I am the only girl in the world who hopes for a five minutes quickie every time).  I take a shower, get ready for bed, have a few minutes of reading time, and turn the lights out by 10:00.

Wednesday:  I attempt to leave work by 5:30.  When I get home, I make and eat dinner.  I edit and post my blog.  I have some quiet time for myself, where I play on the internet, do something around the house, or read a book.  I finish the night by taking a shower, getting ready for bed, and turning the lights out by 10:00.

Thursday:  I attempt to leave work by 5:30.  I go to the gym, spending approximately an hour.  No one else is home on Thursdays most of the time, so it usually is my night to relax and do what I want.  I do not have anything in particular scheduled, but I tend to reserve some time for answering emails or making phone calls when necessary.  I also try to go upstairs earlier than normal so I have time enough to do a face mask before bed.  I still attempt to get my light turned off by 10:00.

Friday:  I leave work by 5:30.  I come home, where my husband makes dinner.  If it is a weekend we have my stepson, I have time to myself or I play games with him.  If it is a weekend we do not have my stepson, it tends to be another husband night where we watch Supernatural.  There is always the potential for social activity on a Friday night, though I try to wriggle out of as many things as I can.  Regardless of what I am doing, I still try to go upstairs early enough to take my shower, get ready for bed, and turn the lights out by 10:00.

Here are some of my struggles with my evening routines.  The number one thing that gets in my way is leaving work late.  I just plain have too many things to do.  Plus the most productive times are before everyone gets there and after everyone leaves.  My second biggest struggle is people talking to me once I get home, often about things I just do not care to discuss with them.  The third biggest struggle is not ending tasks when I should.  I tend to read too long, talk on AIM too late, etc.  The fourth biggest struggle is dealing with unexpected things in the evening.  For instance, my mom calls me unexpectedly or my husband does not go out on Thursday night for some reason.  My last big struggle comes with lights out because my husband is not at all concerned with going to sleep by 10:00.  Most nights, he rolls toward me as soon as I turn the light out looking for talking, cuddling, or more.

Work and outside activities often mean I am not getting home until 7:00 or later.  Between people talking to me, making/eating dinner, and doing necessary chores, all of the time between when I get home and when I try to head upstairs for my bedtime routines (8:30) disappears without me having much fun or accomplishing anything worth noting.  As a result, I almost never head upstairs on time.  I need a half hour or so to take my shower, brush my teeth, and go through my skincare routine.  I also want very much to have some reading time before sleeping, so I try to be in bed between 9:00 and 9:30.  Then, my goal is to turn off the lights and go to sleep by 10:00 at the latest.  If I go up late, everything gets pushed back further.  The later it is when I go to sleep, the less rest I get, and the harder it is to get up on time with the alarm.

How about you guys?  Do you feel like your evenings are worth the time you have in them?  I will continue to figure out ways to make things better or to make peace with what will never be changed.

Do you want a Time Management Part 3 – Weekends blog?  Although honestly, a weekend blog would probably be less about time management and more about conflicting desires for how to spend them.

See you next week!

I Am An Auntie!

First, I apologize this is a day late.  It is just one of those weeks where things are not going right.  At work, I keep having questions to answer and tasks to complete, but no one will leave me alone long enough to actually do anything about them.  Second, the little temporary post I put up yesterday indicated that I might change this blog to Thursday.  When I started the blog, Wednesday was my husband’s school day and so I was home by myself.  Now I find myself trying to post it while he is breathing down my neck wanting dinner, talking, or sex.  Thursday is his bar night, which would give me some alone time to focus, although it is also currently my workout night which eats a chunk of the evening.  Anyway no permanent change to Thursday yet, but it might be coming.  Now we move on to the topic of the week.

To reiterate my title above, I am an auntie.  My sister had a baby on Thursday, March 10, 2016 in the late afternoon.  The baby weighs 7 pounds, 8 ounces.  She measures 21 inches long.  Her name begins with a T, but I will not give it here to protect my sister’s privacy.  My sister and the baby are both healthy, despite T being three weeks early and being delivered by cesarean section.  I have had one short phone call from my sister on Thursday evening.  I have received four photos of the baby, one from my mother and three from my sister’s fiancé (T’s daddy).  I have sent three texts to my sister asking how she and T are doing, and received two brief answers back that all is well.  I have seen three pictures of the baby on facebook, all posted by my sister’s fiancé.  This is the extent of my knowledge about the baby, the delivery, and the general situation.

There are two things that keep coming to the surface when I think about my sister and my new little niece T.  The first is how very disconnected I feel from my family right now.  I have no idea what is going on in Pennsylvania because I am so far away in Virginia.  Although I am trying to figure out timing for making a trip up there, work and family obligations do not allow me to easily make the six hour drive on short notice at this time of year.  I definitely understand that my sister is exhausted, from the surgery and from dealing with the newborn, so I am not so concerned that I have not heard much from her.  I am however a bit surprised and disconcerted that I have heard nothing from my mother.  I expected her to call me all gushy about her first grandbaby, but other than the text when T was first born I have not heard a peep from her.  No one else in the family has contacted me either.  I assume everything has gone well, but it worries me that I seem to be so forgotten down here.  I will probably call my mother this weekend, just to make sure everything is well.  I feel very alone and very not part of my family at the moment though, and it makes me really homesick.

The other thing that surfaces is a general level of anxiety concerning my sister and T.  The pregnancy was not planned.  It happened shortly after a miscarriage for a pregnancy that was planned.  My sister took the miscarriage hard emotionally.  She took the new pregnancy harder.  She has insisted throughout the pregnancy that she did not want to have the baby and that she felt totally unconnected to T.  She was worried that when the baby was born, she would continue to feel disconnected.  She sometimes indicated she wanted to give the baby away.  It makes me even more anxious to know that their family life is not particularly stable.  She and her fiancé had been having some relationship issues prior to the baby, a lot of them revolving around money.  They both have jobs that provide a steady stream of income, but neither makes much.  They have a lot of debt between them.  Her fiancé also has an impulse buying habit, which my sister’s anxiety over finances does not accept easily.  The baby of course is just going to cost even more money, putting more stress on them.  Her fiancé is incredibly excited about the baby, but I do not feel he fully understands my sister’s inability to connect to the situation nor the absolute responsibility required to care for a baby.  I know they will grow up as the situation progresses, but I worry about all of them during the process.  The good news is from what I can gather through her texts my sister does so far seem to be accepting the baby now that T has actually been born.

I feel so helpless.  I cannot be there to offer my love and support to my sister and my niece in this exciting time in their lives.  I hope I can get up there in the next couple of weeks.  I very much want to meet T.  I also want to see my sister and just reassure myself that she is doing well.

Congratulations to my sister!  Welcome to the world T!  See you next week!

I Had a Bad Day - Post Tomorrow (Hopefully)

It has been a bad day.  I have hopes tomorrow will be better, and I will get my post uploaded then.

Side note - I am thinking of bumping my posting day to Thursday.  I think it might be easier on my schedule.  What do you think?

Post-Vacation Blahs

I am suffering from the Post-Vacation Blahs.  A few weeks ago, I whined about the Pre-Vacation Blahs.  Now I am back with more whining about the Post-Vacation Blahs.  These two ailments often go together for those of us with busy lives.  They zap motivation and make it impossible to get things done in a timely manner.  Thus, I am supposed to post a blog in roughly an hour and a half, and I have only now just begun writing it.  I also still need to make and eat dinner in that same time period.  Plus, my husband will likely demand some attention once he gets home.

The Post-Vacation Blahs often hit minutes after I arrive at work after a vacation.  I usually come back to over a hundred emails, dozens of journal entries, dozens of reconciliations, and a crisis or two.  I am overwhelmed from the moment I walk in the door.  Almost nothing is completed by anyone else while I am gone, unless I am away for an extended period of time and something critical is due.  My deadlines do not go away, although the likelihood I will be late increases dramatically after a week off.  I end up going in early, staying late, working through lunch, and putting in hours on the weekend to get through all the stuff that accumulated while I was gone.   Sometimes I feel I put in as many extra hours as I took off and have basically canceled out my vacation.

Then, if I actually left home on my trip, I come back to all the house chores that were not completed while I was gone.  There is always laundry to do when I get back.  If anyone else was home while I was gone, then there will be dishes to wash and random clutter to escort back to proper places.  I have to sort through a huge pile of (mostly junk) mail.  I also have to go through receipts and credit card statements to keep track of expenses, and make sure any bills coming due are paid.  It would be nice if other people would help with these tasks, but often it is left to me regardless of whether anyone else was around the house during my vacation.  If I ask for help, then I get blank stares or half-hearted attempts that I end up redoing anyway.

So that is my version of the Post-Vacation Blahs.  Sadly, I usually feel so overwhelmed when I come back that I do not enjoy my time off even when the actual vacation was pleasant.  For example, this time I had a week off at the end of February and then an extra day for a weekend trip this past weekend.  I visited with family.  I watched movies.  I read books.  I saw a ballet.  I ate good food.  I relaxed.  My week vacation was very relaxing, especially because I was good about not pushing myself to do too many home projects.  My long weekend was even better, which I spent with a cousin just hanging out.  Now, I feel like I might as well not have had the time off at all.  I am still trying to deal with emails that came in while I was gone the first week.  I keep posting journal entries, but for every one that I post three more show up in my inbox.  I already am expecting to work this weekend in order to get things done for the close.  I get too burned out to not take vacations and too overwhelmed to actually take them.  There does not seem to be a good balance ever.

What about you?  Do you ever suffer from the Post-Vacation Blahs?  How do you get through it?

See you next week!

Not Much Progress Part 2 – Front Room March 2016

I was hoping to report significant progress on my front room project, but again I did not do much during the month.  I especially do not have much change that shows in the actual pictures.  Therefore, I will not be giving a space by space comparison report this month.  Instead, I am just going to give a couple of paragraphs on what I actually did accomplish during the month.  Then, I will provide some goals for March.  I did include the February 1, 2016 (left) vs. March 1, 2016 (right) pictures of the four areas below for reference.

I did in fact continue to clean and sort through things in the area.  I threw out the bag of trash that came out of the closet last month.  I disposed of many of the boxes that were around the room, though a few of these have been replaced by new boxes.  I emptied out two boxes of papers that were by the desk and quickly sorted through everything that was in them.  Apparent trash (catalogs, junk mail, etc.) was thrown away, manuals and the housing paperwork went back into one of the boxes to be dealt with later, and paperwork that needs to be looked at more carefully (mostly school materials) was stacked in two piles by the desk to be perused sooner.  On the desk, I cleared one folder of things that needed to be filed by actually filing them into the three black cases stacked by the desk.  I started clearing another folder of mementos I want to keep by incorporating them into scrapbook pages (I was about five years behind, now I am about three years behind).  Some random things have been moved to more appropriate rooms, like the two vacuums that were taken to the basement utility room.  It does not create a lot of impact in the pictures, but I do feel like I made some progress in cleaning up the room.

I also took some initial steps in the planning and designing phase of the project.  I really started with few ideas on how I wanted the room to look when I was done.  I figured the best way to get some inspiration was to visit home furniture and design stores to see what was out there.  I started this past weekend by visiting Tyson’s Corner, where they have several of these types of stores in the mall.  I came away with a general feeling that I want the room to be blues, tans, and whites.  These color schemes contributed to a beachy vibe that I really liked while in West Elm.  In terms of furniture, I liked what I was seeing in West Elm, ZGallery, and Potter Barn (in that order).  I think smaller airier pieces, softer colors, and natural wood are the way I want to go.  Everything is still in the beginning phases, but I at least have some ideas started in my mind.  I also feel a bit more confident about my ability to create something I like.

For March, I have basically the same goals as February.  I need to keep cleaning and sorting the stuff over by the desk area.  I want to continue moving out some of the accumulated junk that should not be in this room at all, like the kitchen items that are sitting in the middle of the floor.  Finally, I need to progress in my plans for overall design.  I have two more stores that I want to visit, Crate & Barrel and Ikea, for ideas and a general awareness of their offerings.  I also need to measure my office area and living room area to determine how much space I actually have available to use for each purpose.  Then, I can revisit the stores that I liked best and start thinking about which pieces of furniture I want that will work in the space I have.

So that is it for this month.  Although I have generally wanted to do this project for a while, I am actually feeling excited about it right now.  I just hope the feeling lasts past this week, so that I will stay motivated to keep working on it.

See you next week!